The first time I met Kay Arthur was at a conference where we both were speaking—me, the rookie, and her, the seasoned professional.

I was already seated at a table between two women when Kay walked in, saw me, looked at one of the women next to me and asked (or actually, told), “Please move over. I need to sit next to Jennifer.”

Of course the woman gladly moved. We all did what Kay said!

I felt so nervous and honored. She made no small talk. She made conversation that was deep, meaningful, important, and interesting. I loved her from that moment on!

Then in September of 2011 when I presented my Fresh Grounded Faith conference in Chattanooga, Kay came! She was so kind and supportive to just attend, yet she sat right there on the front row taking notes.

But the best part was spending the night at her home on Saturday evening.

I’ll never forget my time with her, sitting around her table, sipping peppermint tea from a Russian tea pot, and eating cashew cookies from Singapore on plates from Romania. Her home was a museum of ministry, full of books and mementos from all over the world.

We stayed up well past 11:00 p.m. conversing, and it was so rich. She was so wise! She was 30 years my senior, and I felt as if God sat me at her table to give me a map for my future ministry.

My assistant Angela was with us too, and later, she assessed our teatime this way…

“Jennifer, you got a little sister scolding from Kay,” she said. And Angela was right.

Kay let me know that she didn’t think I needed to have security on the stage at my events, and for Heaven’s sake, let them wear normal clothes and blend in! Yes, ma’am!

Now, if you’ve ever had the privilege of being with Kay, you know she had no unkindness in her. And she also had no need for you to ask her opinion before she gave it.

As we munched on our cashew cookies, she told me that the speakers didn’t need to enter by marching in a line just as the event began—as if we were a bunch of celebrities! Yes, ma’am!

Of course I agreed, and she knew that it was not my intention to look uppity, but as a sister, she let me know what I couldn’t see.

Then she changed the subject and talked through my messages from the weekend. Do you realize what a gift that was to a young speaker and Bible teacher? Of course I didn’t ask for her thoughts, but I’m so glad she shared them!

Kay started with the good news…

She shared that my strongest message was on Saturday morning, complimenting how I handled and applied the passage. She gave such detailed encouragement, and then she emphasized how we need to guard and honor the Word.

“Time is short. Women need the Bible,” she said.

It was then I realized why she made that little transitional statement. It was because she was about to give a less than complimentary assessment of the message I presented on Friday night!

Kay told me that my approach was “clever,” but she didn’t prefer the way I applied the Word. “Just teach the Word,” she said. That was her summary! Yes, ma’am!

I wasn’t offended one bit that she thought my approach to the passage differed from hers. Instead, I listened, considered, and appreciated everything she said about it. Even though I didn’t totally agree (sorry, Kay!), I was so glad for her input and instruction.

Now, 14 years later and no longer a rookie, I still hear Kay’s words in my heart. I still consider them, and I will be forever grateful for her guidance.

Kay Arthur was a woman who loved God’s Word first and most. She loved His people, and I’m so thankful she loved me. My life and ministry are stronger and richer because of her.

We will all miss you, Kay, but Earth is short and Heaven is long!