Straight Talk: Why I Wrote Invisible

Many of you have wondered what my new book, Invisible: How You Feel is Not Who You Are, is about and why I wrote it.

So, I wanted to share with you a conversation I had recently with my daughter-in-law Caroline discussing this very thing.

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Caroline: So, it’s called Invisible. What do you mean by the title Invisible?

Jennifer: Sometimes, women can feel overlooked, unimportant, or insecure — I know I have. And, when we do, we feel invisible.

All women can feel overlooked, unimportant, insecure… invisible.
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Think about it… a mom who spends her days changing diapers, driving the mini-van, and washing dishes. She can feel only as valuable as she is useful — invisible. Or, a woman at work who is constantly ignored when she gives her ideas — she can feel invisible. Or, a single woman at a party trying to be a part of a conversation, but she constantly feels like she doesn’t know what to say, she feels like she is not smart or cute enough, like no one even notices her — invisible.

Caroline: In the book, you use Gomer — from the story of Hosea and Gomer — what drew you to her story?

I used to judge Gomer, now I see the “me” in GoMEr.
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Jennifer: So, I wrote the book Invisible because I have struggled with insecurity and insignificance. I have felt invisible too. And, then, I read this story about a woman named Gomer — a woman chosen, loved, and prone to wander. Bingo. It hit me, that’s me! I think she did what she did because she didn’t realize that she was not how she felt.

Caroline: How did you grow and change through writing Invisible?

Jennifer: Well, I learned that there is a big “me” in GoMEr! I used to judge her — you know, like, I am not her. I could never be her. After all, she left her husband and went for other lovers. She had everything and she left what she had — security and identity — to go find it in all the wrong places. I learned that I cannot judge Gomer because I am Gomer.

God not only loves me and wants me to return to Him, but He goes to great lengths to get me back.
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I have often left my security and identity in Christ to go find it in the other lovers of acceptance, popularity, etc. So, I was humbled by seeing myself for who I am and, then, just plain amazed and overwhelmed to see that God not only loves me and wants me to return to Him, but He goes to whatever lengths He needs to to get me back. Amazing love.

Caroline: I’ve read the book of Hosea – I know it tells the story of how Hosea pursues Gomer even when she turns her back and rejects his persistent love. I’m not sure I should ask my mother-in-law this question, but what is a time you were like Gomer?

Jennifer: Ha! I’ll be honest. I don’t have big dramatic Gomer moments where I turned my back on God. But, I still have had moments where I found myself stuck in a pattern of getting my basic security and identity needs met in the wrong ways and wrong places.

How can I be in Christ and still be in an identity crisis?
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I open the book with a story about one of those moments. We were on a drive to a lake getaway and by the time I arrived, I had been so drawn in by social media and how everyone else’s lives were so perfect that I was a walking, talking, Facebook-stalking identity crisis. So, here I was, “in Christ” but in full blown identity crisis.

Caroline: Oh, we can all relate to that! What is one truth you hope readers will walk away with after turning the last page?

Jennifer: Oh, I hope there are a lot more than one! Gomer’s life is full of teachable truths that can free a woman from her chains of insecurity and get her out of an identity crisis.

We lack nothing in Christ-we have the love we long for, acceptance we need, and He makes us complete.
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But, if I had to choose just one… I hope the reader embraces that she is a Gomer… I am a Gomer… we all are Gomer because we are all dearly loved and accepted. We lack nothing in Christ — we have the love we long for, acceptance we need, and He makes us complete. That is who we are! Sure, we will still feel insignificant and insecure sometimes, but I hope the reader will begin to internalize that how she feels is not who she is. I want women to realize that we are not the be-perfect or the be-tolerated, we are the beloved! Yes! Bring it on!


Question: I am curious, what else would you like to know about Invisible? In the comments below, list any questions you have about Invisible

To get more information about Jennifer’s new book, Invisible: How You Feel is Not Who You Are, visit theInvisibleBook.org.

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Join the conversation in my JenniFriends Facebook group!