This question struck me because it was so poignant and honest. And, it helped me too… it reminded me once again that you can accept something God allows and still experience weariness. All I could really give my blind, tired sister was empathy. And, that is what Jesus gives each of us every day. Read her words, you may see your own.
Over the last five years, I lost my sight from diabetic retinopathy, suffered from renal failure, and had a kidney/pancreas transplant. I have handled the above very well. It is by the grace of God I am here today. I have a very deep faith in my savior but I feel very weak now. I am tired of being blind all of the sudden. I feel guilty even saying this because he has blessed me so very much. I had heard of you for the past few years but just recently found out you are blind as well.
I am curious as to how you deal with it on a daily basis.
I had been praying for most of my life for God to cure my diabetes, to keep me from going on dialysis, and that I wouldn’t die from complications from diabetes. He answered my prayers! But, now I am blind and I am so tired of it.
I so understand the heaviness of your heart. I think loss requires mourning and as we mature and life stages change, we experience the loss all over again and the grief and mourning follows. Perhaps that is the wave that has washed over you.
And, let’s be honest… blindness is tiring! It sucks the life out of us just to do the simplest tasks, keep everything in our heads, and constantly compensate in millions of ways only a blind person understands. I have gone through stages where I am just plain tired. And of course, tired of being blind. That kind of tiredness is a soul fatigue and it demands some real soul rest.
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Sometimes we just have to say, “Enough! Blindness is wearing me out and I need space, time, and rest… I need to to slow down and regroup.”
Physical, mental, emotional and spiritual rest do a soul good.
And, sometimes the best remedy for the fatigue of blindness is knowing you are not alone. My friend, you are not alone. I painfully and completely understand. And, God understands.
Do not feel guilty for the tension and frustration you are feeling. Even Jesus acknowledged in the Garden that He would rather have the cup He was about to drink pass from Him. Jesus understands your frustration, your fatigue, and your loss. I promise you, as one who walks the same path; you will not always feel this way. What God doesn’t remove, He gives grace to carry. You will feel better. God’s grace will absorb some of the sorrow and carry the burden with and even for you.
You have been through a lot in your life. I so admire how you have faced it all with such faith. You inspire me.
Please know, my sweet sister, you are not alone. I understand. God will use all this in your life and in the life of others.
P.S. Remember you can submit your question by emailing me here.
Question: What encouragement can you share with our sisters who have “had enough”? Let’s encourage one another today!